Keith Milne
By Keith C. Milne
There are potentially a lot of variables that go into deciding which vehicle to own or drive, be it a car, truck, or motocycle. Now that modern technology has allowed us to manufacture every imaginable type of machine, gadget, or device, we can for the first time ever choose from an unbelieveable array of types, colors, and sizes of vehicles, and completely customize them to reflect who we are. And, we can complete this ensemble with a full spectrum bumper sticker allowing us to really drive home whatever message we might want the world to know about us, or in general.
Whether or not we realize it, we are saying a lot about who we are and what we do or do not value just by the selection of our vehicle, the color, style, features, stickers, type of windows-darkened or not, tires, wheels, and sound system all convey messages about how we want the world to perceive us.
Sometimes, this means that otherwise docile individuals will choose to reflect what they are not, but might wish to be. For example: the quiet accountant who decides to get a big, jacked up truck and then drive super aggressively in an attempt to convey to others that they are someone to be reckoned with.
Of course, this is all fear based behavior ultimately, due to the fact that we are all really afraid of just about everything. We are afraid of how we might someday die. We are afraid of others who intimidate us. We are afraid of running out of money, being controlled by others, not having any choices, and more.
So, combine these basal fears with modern vehicles that make driving 80 feel like 50, with a little extra fear emanating out of the Covid-19 pandemic, and stir in a little political rage and exhaustion over mask wearing, and then top it all off with weariness and anger over why our reality is what it is these days, and what you end up with is a perfect recipe for automotive bullying, control dramas, and intimidation tactics.
I cannot believe the amount of this ugly, aggressive, driving behavior that is taking place everywhere I go these days. Everyone seems to be in such a big hurry! And that becomes their norm and their habit!
I now spend a lot of my own driving time really observing how others drive and what they do and engage in while driving, and it’s quite shocking to see the wild, dangerous driving behaviors over simple little perceived transgressions.
God forbid should you pull out and have the other person think you did it on purpose because now they might have to slow down a little bit! They don’t even think about the fact that they were driving about twice the speed limit, and that the other person actually had plenty of distance to pull out, but did not realize your speed, and that’s why there was an issue at all.
On the highway, all you have to do is drive the speed limit, which, I guarantee is slower than almost everyone else, and you will have pack after pack of cars that come from miles back and slowly, but surely, will advance towards you, then all shift over into the fast lane to go around you right on each others tail ends, doing 75-90 and everywhere in between. Although, every so often there will be that one person in the pack that will quickly ride up on your tail end and then sit there actually expecting you to do something about it.
You can see the aggression in these packs. People ride up on others, practically tapping the other driver’s bumper trying to tell them to move over. Sometimes, the riding up on the other person will be done with much bravado and extra aggression. It is almost as if they are trying to tell the other person that they did something they shouldn’t have, when, in reality, the whole maneuver is only being done to feel powerful. “I can make others move out of my way.” and that makes the person feel strong and formidable.
Other times I’ll witness control dramas. It is not always evident to me why they are taking place. Sometimes I’ll come up on a few cars that are going only 50 mph! As I pass I can see it is a clear case of the slow car in front deciding to go even slower, and even slower yet, in order to control the other person or at least force them into going around. I’ve done this too.
For me, nothing aggravates me more than when I’m already exerting a lot of self-discipline to drive the speed limit when almost everyone else is ripping past me at just shy of the speed of sound, and some idiot will come riding up on me really fast! Like I’m going to move over into . . . OOPS! There is no other slower lane. Guess you’ll have to go around me. Again, if you want to go fast, FINE, go around. I’m already in the slow lane, going slow, which you saw when you rode up on me and now you actually expect me to speed up for you? Wow! Now that’s driving with your ego on the hood if I ever did see it.
I’ve also seen quite a few plain vanilla jerks! They drive big jacked up trucks or loud cars with modified exhaust or Harley Davidson’s and are constantly revving the engine. Just noise making, look-at-me-making-all-this-noise-jerks. Aren’t I cool? Aren’t I formidable? Aren’t I scary? They sometimes like to burn rubber, ride up on people for no good reason, even in town, and have to ROAR everywhere they go as if to say screw you, get the hell out of my way all the time. (Really just scared to death little boys with big trucks and sometimes guns too).
It is truly interesting to me how people gravitate to what makes them angry and upset while driving, often only because of their unconscious fear of being alone on the highway with no one else around. They would rather get all caught up in keeping up with the pack, playing ride the bumper, the fast lane switching game, or the flash the lights at them, or flip them off games while driving everyday, rather than just slowing down and letting the idiots pass them.
The driving behaviors are bad enough, but then, adding even more insult to injury, it is also often accompanied by over-the-top noise of some kind. Crashing sounds as the flatbed trailer being towed by the oversized, double-axle, hog of a truck pulling it goes by. First, the truck exhaust system roaring, followed by the super loud rattling of the trailer behind it banging over bumps in the road. Sometimes, it is even worse than this. A big, loud truck, pulling the banging trailer, and then add in super loud, annoying music, and cigarette smoke! Yikes! 🙁
It is horrible how many folks seem to even go out of their way in order to cut someone off, beat them to the light, or will drive 65 mph in the fast lane of the highway next to a tractor-trailer doing the same speed right next to them in the slow lane, while a dozen infuriated drivers stack up behind them, and they refuse to move over on purpose! They are drooling from their ability to be able to control that many other people.
We’ve already put a huge dent in “bullying” in schools, then why do we all put up with this behavior while driving? More law enforcement is definitely needed, and tickets for visible transgressions should become more the norm than the exception. Beyond punitive measures such as these, I think we all need to simply slow down a little more in general in life. Why are we in such a big hurry anyway?
I often end up right behind the people who passed me on the highway when I get off at my exit! Their whole “I drive fast to get there faster” is mostly a myth. You’ll be lucky to save a whole 5 minutes in the end. But boy will you often pay for that 5 minutes with untold stress and a lot of extra gas used.
At times, it seems as if the pandemic hasn’t taught us anything at all. In fact, it almost seems like people’s barbarism is worse now than ever before. For me, I’m already in the practice of doing things slower than I used to on purpose. I am merely trying to implement and practice what I wish to be as a man and an individual. I am not interested in why you want me to go faster like you, please just leave me alone and go around me.
In the spirit of the meaning underlying Gandhi’s famous quote, I am trying to “be what I wish to see in the world.” I can only control myself and nothing more. All we can do, really, is exhibit and behave how we wish to be, and wish for those around us to be.
May you learn much on your own personal journey towards personal enlightenment and self-improvement.
